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I see two of you.

One quiet, honest and soul-baring side. The other a loud, ruthless and bitter one. It was breathtaking how you juggled both. I wondered if anyone had seen both of these sides to you. I wouldn’t bet on it. But, I liked seeing both sides. It meant knowing your strengths and your weaknesses. I wouldn’t dream of it any other way. I questioned your earnestness, though. You looked pained when you told me the tales that led to this duality of yours. I couldn’t imagine the conflict, the ache, the trauma that led to the reconciliation of your two sides. It doesn’t seem easy. I smiled at you vaguely when we lived your duality together. Knowing fully well that I too and probably everyone around us had this dual nature. Only I was busy kidding myself. While you had embraced it. You felt the urge to live in the greys for the black and white didn’t satisfy you. I could learn something from you. For each morning, I rejected my other side. The side that was brutal, selfish and cold. I took comfort in knowing that no one would imagine that the same kind person was also lethal.

I was kidding myself. Just like many others out there.

The black and whites don’t quench my thirst anymore. I am beginning to like the grey. Maybe someday, you will see it.